Trust your instincts: things I wish I would have known when I was fifteen

Posted on October 10, 2016 by janelleevans

“Deep down inside, I knew I shouldn’t marry him, but he was so insistent I gave in.”

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard statements like that from divorced women. This entry is not to belittle those women—they’re suffering enough as it is. Divorce sucks, and is painful for all parties involved. But I would like to give a heads up to young women who haven’t married, in hopes they won’t make the same mistake.

Marriage is not something you should enter into lightly, with thoughts of well…this probably isn’t going to work out mulling over in your brain as you walk down the aisle.

Before marriage is the time to give long consideration to the person you’re dating. If you’re gut instincts are telling you something is off, it’s time to shore up that courage inside you and walk away. I don’t care how long you’ve been together. I don’t care if everyone around you thinks they are the most amazing person ever. Trust your instincts.

Being married is awesome—I love it—but it’s also hard. It takes a huge amount of patience and effort between both husband and wife to make it work. And if you walk into a marriage with doubts already there in your mind about your spouse, how will you ever find the willingness to work through the struggles that arise?

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Status update

Posted on October 3, 2016 by janelleevans

Great news for all of you waiting for the last installment of the Rory’s Choice series, the editor and I have finished the first major edits for the book. It may be the first step in publishing, but the first walk through is always the most grueling, so I consider everything from here downhill. This is a huge step in the right direction.

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Failure and loss are not the same thing

Posted on September 26, 2016 by janelleevans

Nobody likes to lose—not even me. Yet, to live a life without ever experiencing loss or disappointment is impossible. Sometimes I think we forget this when we look back at our glorious youth. I know I’m always more willing to recount my life’s victories than the losses, but when I give it honest consideration, there have been many disappointments along the way. Does this make me a failure? No. And I think this is what is missing for many of the rising generation I see around me.

Not everything in life will go the way you want. Sometimes you will bomb that test you studied for. Maybe you’ll practice your guts out and still won’t make the team.  Or maybe you’ll make the team but never win a game. The variables are endless, but to lose does not make you a failure. Failures only happen when we give up, stop trying to learn and improve despite the disappointments. Yet, neither is a life well lived if you only do things that come easy to you. DON’T BE AFRAID TO LOSE. Most of life’s growth happens during a struggle.  So be bold, live a life out of your comfort zone, fall on your face, screw up royally. As long as you don’t give up, you CANNOT fail.

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Worth the read “The Reckoners” series by Brandon Sanderson

Posted on September 19, 2016 by janelleevans

I’ve already mention the first book in this series, Steelheart, as a book worth reading a couple of years ago, but after recently finishing the entire series I have got to give these books one more shout out.

As always, Brandon Sanderson’s writing is topnotch. These fast paced books aren’t very long, which might bode well for those young men in your life that don’t love reading. There’s lots of guns, explosions, and bad guys dying, which also might help hold their interest. These novels are an interesting spin on super heroes, with a fantastic plot so intriguing I’m still mulling it over.

The books in order are Steelheart, Firefight, Calamity. This series is money well spent, I promise.

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Sleep? That’s so lame.

Posted on September 12, 2016 by janelleevans

Oh, why don’t my teenagers want to sleep anymore? Not so long ago, it only took a word and off they went like good little children. Now it takes several hours of “close that book—turn off that kindle—why are your lights back on?” Ugh! As a writer, they’re killing me. I never get to bed on time. I can’t get up as early as I used to, so now I have less hours to work each morning. Maybe it’s time I started stocking chloroform. It’s not like they don’t need the sleep. Every morning they whine about being tired. You’d think they’d see the connection and try to get to bed earlier.  Nope. It is the bane of having teenagers. To kind of borrow a title from Jane Austen, they have neither Sense nor Sensibility until there mid-twenties when their brains grow back.

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Between the lines for Rory Choice book three

Posted on September 5, 2016 by janelleevans

As I edit this last book of the Rory’s Choice series, I find myself thinking of the spin-off book that came to mind when I finished writing this series years ago. You’re probably all going to die of shock when I tell you this, but the character I want to delve deeper into is Robbi. I know she comes across as the meanest sister of all time, but there is also more to her than meets the eye. You’ll understand what I mean as you read the third Rory’s Choice book. Things come to light for Rory in a way they never have before about her sister. And I can see Robbi’s struggles making a fantastic book. Mmm…we’ll have to see what the future brings.

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Well…it’s only taken me three books to get here

Posted on August 29, 2016 by janelleevans

As I work through the edits on the final Rory Choice book in the series I’ve noticed I no longer feel upset at any of the changes the editor wants me to make. Even if she demands I rewrite an entire chapter, I can roll up my sleeves right then and there and get to work. It’s crazy the battle I used to have within myself every time my editor wanted to make changes before. Mind you I never told her—that would be super unprofessional.

I’d get up, go for a walk—do this whole mental pep-talk. “Come on now, Janelle, will it really change the story that much to restructure that chapter? Just get in there and give it a chance.”

And it’s not that I don’t love this last book in the series. It’ll be the icing that makes you want to read the whole series again, but they’re just words. Every novel is full of them. Yet, the best books almost make you forget they are there. How do they do it? Editing the crap out of every overwritten sentence we authors love to make. So bring on the shredder, I’m aiming for seamless people! I want my readers to have the very best work I can produce. Yes, we stubborn types have to be conked over the head a couple of times to finally see reason.

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Saved by a shoestring tackle

Posted on August 22, 2016 by janelleevans

This weekend my youngest son had his very first football game. Most of the boys on his team have played for several years, so my son tries to make up for his inexperience with speed and aggression. For the most part it works, until while playing defensive corner he cut so far in to get to the quarterback he missed the running back with the ball. He’d left his side wide open for the running back to take it all the way to the end zone for a touchdown.

Oh man! We had shut-out the other team to this point, which guaranteed them a pizza party for the whole team. And we were less than a quarter away from getting it. If that player scored it would be my son’s fault.

Covering my mouth in horror, I watched my son’s missed tackle book for the opposite end zone when our very experienced safety dived and did a great shoestring tackle. Oh, how grateful am I?

I know my son is going to make mistakes. Having gone through this with a son now in high school, I understand the game takes time for players to really grasp. But to have him be the clear reason the whole team wouldn’t get a party his first time out would not be a great way to start football memories. Let’s save those disappointments for at least a couple of games down the road 🙂

Really, I’m just glad my boys like to play. Football is my favorite sport of all time.

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Edits have begun…

Posted on August 15, 2016 by janelleevans

Great news! This week, I began editing the third and final book of the Rory’s Choice series. I’m excited for all to experience the pinnacle of Rory’s growth, though I can promise it won’t be out next month.  Editing takes time. 🙂

Thank you to all who have supported my efforts to this point in my writing career. This last book, Rory’s Choice: Defined, has an ending guaranteed to make you giddy. It sure left me smiling for days.

For those who maybe haven’t discovered my novels yet, you can find paper copies of Rory’s Choice and Rory’s Choice: Consequences at Amazon.com

If you prefer digital editions, head to smashwords.com to download your copies today. Amazon struggles to get ebook versions right sometimes.

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Channeling my mother

Posted on August 8, 2016 by janelleevans

This past weekend I showed up with my family to clean the church building we go to on Sundays. Sadly, we were the only ones who showed up until an elderly couple came along about an hour later. So what could have been less than an hour worth of work, if everyone had showed up, turned into a grueling three-hour scrub fest.

There was no point griping about the unfairness of it all, the building needed to be cleaned. I kept saying to my daughter “Stay with me.” Through the many windows and mirrors, through the toilets, counters and floors, “Stay with me,” came out about a zillion times.

“Jeez, Mom,” my daughter said, “why do you keep saying that? I haven’t left you once.”

I smiled, realizing it was a phrase my mother had repeated to me on many occasions, usually involving hard work, and now I was doing it to my daughter.

I do a lot of things because of my mother. I clean in a specific order, the same way my mother did. I always do my hair and makeup because my mother stressed the importance of looking my best each day. I’m not exactly like my mother in everything, but at the very core of who I choose to be is influenced by the woman she was. An influence I can now see reaching beyond me and into my own children. That kind of impact shouldn’t be overlooked, or demeaned. When you look back and see the ripple effect of a mother, no one can deny their role isn’t a powerful one.

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