Janelle Evans

When I was young, I thought grownups had it easy—masters of their own worlds.  I couldn’t wait, no more pop quizzes or endless homework from teachers who obviously had nothing better to do with their sad lives than torture me.  No more parents telling me when to be home or doling out chores—I would finally be free. 

As time has passed, I’ve come to realize the great illusion of youth.  None of us is ever free.  You are beholden to your parents who offer physical, emotional, and financial support.  Grownups are beholden to the bills they must pay for their own support.  Teachers hold in their hands the ability to destroy your college dreams.  A boss can destroy a grownups life with two words, “You’re fired”.

Yes, life as an adult is not as easy as I thought it would be.  But it sure is nice to stay up late every once and awhile eating a big bowl of ice cream—even if I did have to buy it.

All right young ladies, I want you to sit back and think about the most popular, beautiful, seems to have-it-all girl in your class.  Can you picture her?  The flowing locks, dazzling smile, a rockin’ bod that looks perfect in everything.  Have you ever thought to yourself, “Man it must be great to be her.”  Or better yet, “If only I could be her—things would be easier.”  Don’t you believe it.  All women have insecurities and trials in their lives—even this so-called vision of perfection.  And if she’s reading this right now, she’d whole heartily agree.  The popular are criticized, the shy overlooked, the flirts seen as less than virtuous, the list is endless.  Don’t wish for someone else’s life.  You’ll miss the fabulous one that’s right in front of you.  How fabulous—is up to you.

How do you define yourself when people ask who you are?  If you had asked me in high school, I would have said, “I’m a tomboy, softball player.  I cheer because I like to stunt with the yell-leaders (boy cheerleaders)—not because of the little outfit.  If you see me wearing a dress, I’m on stage acting.  I don’t do girlie.”  At that age, my list of “I don’t do’s” was very long.  If something looked even remotely “girlie”—forget it—I wouldn’t even try it. 

After high school, I was forced to try new things.  For my theater scholarship, I had to take formal dance lessons.  You’ll never see me on “So you think you can dance”, but to this day, I love to watch all forms of dancing, and still practice pirouettes in my kitchen.  I had to have my lifeguard training to work at a kid’s camp for the hearing-impaired in Oregon.  I’m still an avid swimmer, and wish I could have competed in high school.

In this New Year, don’t be like I was in high school.  Look for opportunities to try new things.  You don’t have to be the best at something to enjoy it.  Everyone has hidden talents and gifts.  You have to stretch beyond what’s comfortable to find them.

The New Year is a very special time—a time to reflect on the past, but also an opportunity to consider a course for your future.  Maybe you like the direction your life is going, but if you don’t, it’s never too late to change.  Okay, let’s face it, we all have things we’d like to fix about ourselves, so this post is for all of us. 

Start by setting a goal—a realistic goal—you’ll only frustrate yourself if you pick near impossible feats like climbing Mount Everest, or losing 100 pounds in six months.  Once you have a goal in mind do more than just write it down—tell someone.  The buddy system makes you accountable to more than yourself, and is a great way to keep you motivated.

I find breaking goals down into daily requirements works best.  I don’t just say I’m going to write another novel this year.  Even thinking about the hundreds, and hundreds of pages I will have to write to do this gives me a headache, so I simplify.  I will write at least two pages every day—except Sunday—even crazies like me need a break every once and while.  Two pages a day isn’t nearly as scary.  And is something I can easily accomplish, which gives me the daily boost of encouragement I need to keep going.

Anything you want to be or do is possible—even Mount Everest if you want.    All the little goals you chip away at are building you closer to greater things.  Just believe in yourself.  The only one standing in your way is you.