My daughter turned thirteen in April, making her an official teenager—oh, sweet love! We still get along fairly well in the mom/daughter dynamic of life; I just wish she’d try harder to be more positive. The easy giggles she used to have are being replaced by what I consider to be a cankering pessimism.

I get it: life is hard, kids are mean, and things don’t always go your way, but focusing on the negative isn’t going to make your life better. Allowing pain, sorrow, anger, to consume your thoughts creates an exhausting vortex inside that feeds on your self-worth. The only way to combat the negative is by activity seeking to see the positive around you. Yes, even in your darkest moment, you can find something positive to be grateful for. It takes practice, especially if you’ve been feeding the negative monster for a long time, but it’s worth the effort. Where negative feelings drain us, positive ones energize. Who couldn’t use an extra shot of energy to face life every day?