This week my daughter was asked on her first date, not “hey, how about we hangout at somebody’s house,” but a real date. She was beyond excited, so excited she straightened her hair even though they would be going paddle boarding after going to lunch.

By the time I was a high school senior I had gone on lots of dates, but for some reason in my daughter’s generation it seems to be seldom done. It such an odd thing for me. These kids don’t go on real dates–they just hangout. Now, it’s not that I want to marry my daughter off at eighteen–far from it–but dating is an important part of the growing up process. Without the noise of a larger group, you’ll discover whether or not you can even hold a conversation. It even helps you whittled down the kinds of traits you do or don’t like. There is no one-size-fits-all person out there, but if you hardly ever date how in the world are you supposed to figure out what will work for you.

My advice…remember, dating isn’t a marriage contract, it doesn’t even have to be about being in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. So get out there and go on as many real dates as you can. It’s good for you and will be of great benefit when you finally decide to start looking for someone to marry. For my daughter, I hope that’s many, many years down the road.